Arden in September (The Suburban Pirate)

from Jettison Yr Dreams by Holy Profane

	/

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lyrics

I return and I find you changing.
I can't help but think it's synonymous with degrading,
it didn't used to be that way.

I've been trying to squeeze the color
out of pretty moments and coming up empty.
was there really anything for me when you were living so intensely
and I was stuck- awestruck- wondering if I could compete?

If I repeat, would I really change,
or do I fall into the hypnosis pattern that is my hardwired brain?

I wonder what it meant when I dreamt in my thirteen year old skin.
I return to the fair where he romped, bringing chaos, or so he'd think.

Didn't it all add up to nothing?-
his friends that he was going to take up there with him-

to the top of the ferris wheel where they threw their half-eaten meals
to the unsuspecting crowd below, thought that they were waging war.
a childish understanding of anarchy;
punk rock misinterpreted by their privileged ennui-

but is there really anything for us now?
we take ourselves so seriously.

so I'm sorry I convinced you to buy that drumset
to start a band before we abandoned each other.
and I'm sorry I grew so self-righteous and serious,
thinking I was too good for anything that we used to do.

and you're sorry you were such a compulsive liar,
but your reality just couldn't match your inner truth-
that the world was all beautiful, chaos, and fire,
but your alcoholic father and fiance, they extinguished you.

you see, nothing could prepare us for the anti-climax,
taking graduation photos on the church steps-
conquerers spitting passion for some next big project,
had no way of knowing that this was it.

credits

from Jettison Yr Dreams, released June 1, 2021

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Holy Profane Detroit, Michigan

Lo-fi word spew and pretty noise experiments

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